You Listen to her...

When I was pregnant and exhausted an “already a mom” friend told me “you don’t know exhaustion- just you wait”.

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When I was a mom to a newborn and exhausted a mom to an older child told me “just wait till they start teething”.

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When I was dealing with a teething child I was told “just wait till you are pregnant again and have a kid then you’ll know exhausted”.

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Every time I hit the exhaustion milestone someone moved the god-damn end zone.

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My own experience of my own exhaustion was never enough.

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Why do we do this to each other?

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Every time I reached out for help in the form of validation I was met with someone telling me I didn’t know myself.

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And we do this to each other all the time.

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And then we wonder why we start to doubt our own knowing of what feels true to us.

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I have said it before and I’ll say it again: how do you know a mother’s experience whether she is exhausted or not, whether she is content or not, whether she is drowning or not?

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You ask her.

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And I dare you to actually listen.