This summer I paired up with my favorite local artist and asked her to create a logo for Be.

When I talk to people about why the name Be: I explain how I wanted to shed the layers of “should”, “have to”, “better do” and create a space where a person can return home to themselves. A place where they can Be. and where they can decide what if anything follows after that Be.

I also wanted that logo to represent my company values and stand as a visual reminder of why I choose to show up in this way for my clients day in and day out. I believe in growth, openness, independence and a sense of community. I believe this is created by showing up for each other and letting yourself still believe in life’s seemingly magical moments.

It is a lot to ask for a logo and I knew that Sarah Fenerty was the woman for the job. The soft lines of the heron extending into flowers of new growth captures these values and the space I am working to create for all of you.

A heron represents independence and is known to be an alluring bird that can flourish in a crowd. When you look up the symbolic meaning behind a heron you find words like” Calm, grace, patience and being present”- yes! These are all things I hope to bring to my clients through our work together. These are essential to growth.

The flowers in the logo show growth ad one’s ability to make something new, to lean into the magic of life.

It was a lot to ask for in a logo and a great reminder that until we ask the answer aways remains no. Yet by reaching out and taking a chance Sarah Fenerty created a logo that had all the parts I wanted to convey and I got to further support an amazing local artist. Sometimes, life can be a win-win- see….magic.

In my personal life I have a short list of friends that I still talk on the phone too. I love those calls. The calls and the people ground me. These talks are special because it is rare to find someone who will carve out time in their day to talk to you. These calls remind me of parts of myself that I have stated that I wanted to grow but often find ways to ignore. These calls are with the people who have never been afraid to tell me when I have gone too far or ask me the hard questions while listening to my overly detailed answers.

Over the past week I have had two of these phone calls that both reminded that my goal of 2019 was to start to “un-do” and continue to work towards slowing down and being present. Even at this moment I have cupcakes in the oven, sweet potato hash on the rack below and am writing this blog post all before 7am. Some of us run on high. Some of us will always have six different projects going. I thrive with those people- I am that person.

I also know that we all need to meet ourselves where we are at and where we are at is an ever moving target. 2019 has been a year of celebration and growth so far outside of my comfort zone that there are moments where I forget to breathe. I know I am not alone in this. This year has brought so much change to a lot of people. If that is you I invite you to join me in giving yourself permission to simply be where you are right now. Take a cue from Brene Brown and actually write yourself a permission slip on a piece of paper.

My permission slip will say that I can spend the next two weeks on vacation and return to blogging when I am ready. It will be a remind to let myself be human and stop needing to be super human. That sometimes the not-doing of things actually brings us the greatest reward.

I invite you to give yourself permission to leave things a bit un-done, to leave parts of your life open. If history and research stand true I wager that you will find magic in the letting go. When we stop holding on so tightly to things around us we will find the space and grace we so desire.

As you pack up the kids, run the grocery store for the 8th time this week or hold down the work fort as you seem to be the only person in the office this week I beg you to remember: Stress is stress is stress.

Good stress still wears you down. Being around people 24/7 because there is no where private in the beach house filled with extended family, still wears you down. Not drinking enough water because you laid out all day on your beach towel will still dehydrate you and it will put stress on your body.

Getting married? Still stress. Running a trail race? Still stress. In early pregnancy or just had a baby? You bet- stress.

By now you maybe thinking that all hope is lost. If everything is stress then why bother with all this “self care”.

Stress not! This is a more you know situation. When we zoom out and realize the stress that is present in our life it allows us to put buffers in our days and it especially allows us to mentally give ourselves space and grace to take care of our own needs just a-little bit more than we do right now.

Here is three “stress buffers” you can add today:

1. Spend 3 minutes during your lunch break to breathe. Set an alarm on your phone. Now count to three as you breathe in and then count to three as you breathe out.

2. Get up 5 minutes earlier and step outside. Just stand there. Maybe you stand there for a minute or two and take in your surroundings. Can’t get outside? Open a window and watch the morning unfold before you start your day.

3. Away with family this week? Take a break. Go for a solo 5-10 minute walk (mama’s someone will watch your lovely kids)

When thoughts of “I should be…” arise remember family/vacations/slow weeks at work are kinda stressful too and if your cup is empty then you will be pulling from your reserves to be present which will only cause you to be further stressed out.

So here is your reminder that you are kicking ass. You are doing all the things and yes, even vacations can be overwhelming. Let me know what your favorite stress buffer is on instagram @Be.counseling

I recently caught myself zig-zaging. I was avoiding sitting down to complete some work and found myself outside power-washing the house. Now even though I fully admit in the zig-zagging, this task of power washing the house has been on my to-do list for the past two years and left me feeling refreshed. It reminded me not to always believe what I think. It reminded me to question my norms.

While out there I realized that I have been accepting a moldy house for almost two years. I had build a pile of excuses that kept me from completing the task. I told myself reasons why I was ok with a moldy house. I let myself believe my excuses. I let the tape in my head run so that I had no way out. I allowed the status quo to go on because admittedly it is easier that way. Change is messy.

Your body and mind want to continue with the status quo because it takes less energy. Habits and patterns are your way to simplify your life. Think of your morning routine or your weekly grocery list, by keeping these the same you are limiting the amount of energy you use in a day. Now think of a time you learned a new skill or started a new job. You were exhausted by the end of the day.

Why? Learning new skills is mentally and emotionally taxing and that playing into our physical exhaustion levels.

It makes sense why we continue to live in the status quo. Change is messy and takes energy.

When we choose to change and when we lay down our excuses we start to see that we are the ones standing in our way. There are situations when staying with the status quo is accepting things that get under our skin and drain us. These situations could be keeping you from the job you desire, the relationship you seek or it could be keeping you living in a moldy house.

I know that standing where you are looking at where you want to be can feel daunting. Sometimes it feels as if all we ever do is change. Here is the thing: we never know what is on the other side of our old habits and “When there’s a big disappointment, we don’t know if that’s the end of the story. It may be just the beginning of a great adventure.” (― Pema Chödrön, )

Go seek adventure. Get messy. Find Bliss.